Reviewing - Star Wars: The Originals
No one wants to admit that there's a whole lot of stupid stuff in these classics...sure, there's lightsabers, but are we all going to just pretend that Leia never kissed her own freaking brother?! And how does Han not believe in the Force?? And how the heck are a few raccoon-smurf care-bears supposed to take down an advanced military army?
The Best: The Empire Strikes Back
The Worst: Return of the Jedi
A New Hope (*****)
In which a young woman must choose between a wanted criminal, her brother, and a giant dog as her romantic partner.
After Jenna and I got through the prequel trilogy, I wondered if the 1970s-era special effects would leave Jenna uninterested compared to those of the films we’d just seen. It had also been years since I’d seen this film. Sure, I’d watched it all the time as a kid, and in high school my friends and I had done a watch-through of all six films in one night, but much of the film was a distant memory. It turns out I had forgotten quite a bit about what made this film so great.
First, the special effects hold up. While some moments look dated for sure, I was still just as on the edge of my seat during the climactic Death Star space battle as I was when I was kid. The Millenium Falcon still steals the show. Secondly, I had forgotten how likeable the characters were. Compared to the dry, dull, absolutely boring characters of Episode I, this movie really takes off when you get Han, Leia, Luke and Chewie all in the same space. Watching them yell and argue with each other is a blast. One thing that I really noticed is how self-deprecating the Star Wars galaxy is in this film. In Lord of the Rings, everything that’s magic feels like magic. There’s a sense of awe and reverence when you meet the Elves or see Gandalf do any of his tricks. In Star Wars, when you see the almost mythical Falcon, we don’t watch Luke marvel at it for a full five seconds. We get “What a piece of junk!”. Leia says of Chewbacca, “Will someone get this big walking carpet out of my way?”. The movie is poking fun of itself, and as a result the characters become more believable to us. We’ve never seen a Wookie before, so when Leia calls him a big walking carpet, we laugh because that’s what we’ve been thinking the whole time. When Luke calls the Falcon junk, what ends up happening is we fall in love with the Falcon because it defies expectations, not because we’ve been told to love it.
All in all, this is still a great movie, and it makes the prequels look that much worse in hindsight.
The Empire Strikes Back (*****)
In which we learn more about incest and the importance of family
The hyperdrive never working is my favourite part of this movie.
We’re in a Sci-Fi movie where there’s big walking carpets and a mystical all-powerful energy that binds the universe together and asteroid monsters…but the hyperdrive never works. Every time they punch the accelerator and the Millenium Falcon lets out that mechanized whine, you can’t help but smile. For one thing, we’ve all been there. We’ve all been in a tight situation and then things have suddenly gotten worse. For another thing, it means the action is just that much more intense. There’s no easy get-out-of-danger-free card for our heroes. They’re gonna have to keep their wits about them and work harder than ever.
Beyond that, there’s a reason this film is considered by most as the best Star Wars ever. The walker assault is just awesome. We get Yoda – and I forgot how funny he was. Darth Vader says those four irrevocable and inimitable words. Luke gets battered to a pulp. There’s so many great moments to love here. This one was Jenna’s favourite out of all the ones she’d seen so far.
But yeah, for all that, I still can’t get enough of the hyperdrive never working. That’s what makes Star Wars so different from other Sci-Fi and Fantasy works. Star Wars gives you a bunch of really cool tech and gadgets – but none of it works the way it’s supposed to. It’s become famous for being a “used galaxy” – and that’s what’s unique about it.
Return of the Jedi (****1/2)
In which a wicked dictatorship rebuilds a massive super-weapon, deciding to make it's predecessor's weakness even larger
First of all, I think this movie gets too much flak for bringing in the Ewoks. I thought the Ewoks were fine! Sure, they’re cute and a little silly, but what’s wrong with that?
Secondly, I think the criticisms against Princess Leia’s role in the first act are warranted. I get it – I understand how her outfit became instantly iconic – but you can’t deny that Leia’s been a powerhouse the last two movies, and this reduces her somewhat. She was strong-willed, a total boss, and she didn’t do anything she didn’t want to do. Then she gets captured and has to become a slave to Jabba – and while its not totally clear what that entails, it’s clear that whatever it is isn’t pleasant. It’s a degrading place to put her – and if it doesn’t make sense to put Luke or Han there, it shouldn’t make sense to put her there either.
But hey, let’s get to the meat of this story. This movie feels big. The final battle with Luke and Vader is unabashedly epic. The shot with them both as just dark silhouettes swinging their sabers while a choral score plays…man! There’s nothing not to love about that. It’s true that the fight choreography is slower than it was in the prequels, but the dramatic weight of the fight is by no means diminished. This film is a thrilling and satisfying conclusion to the original Star Wars trilogy.
This post was originally published on December 16th, 2019.