So you’re sitting in that seat reading this blog post. Yes, you. This is one of those writer-speaking-directly-to-the-reader things. I am talking to you. You’re still here, still reading. No particular reason why I’m asking, but why are you reading this? Are you bored or something? Don’t you have anything better to do? Anything at all?
You do have something better to do. I can tell. You know what I’m talking about. It’s that thing in the back of your mind that either you wish you were doing or that you should be doing. It’s definitely more important than reading this, anyway. This particular post is not likely to change your life in any significant way, nor is it all that relevant in the first place. After all, you have better things to do.
If you’ve made it to this paragraph, I have to ask why you’ve continued to read when we’ve already determined that there are other more important things you could be doing. Then again, maybe something is keeping you here. Perhaps you’re being held at gunpoint and forced to read this. Maybe your eyes have been propped open and you’re strapped to the seat that you’re in. But, for the moment, let’s assume that you don’t have to read this – because that’s the far more likely option.
Then...why read it?
Why not go talk with a friend? Why not go catch up on homework or your favourite hobby? Why not clean your room? You know it’s not as clean as it should be. Why not learn to cook something new? Go outside. Throw a party. Write something yourself.
...you’re still here. You’re still reading. I just gave you eight things that are more valuable than reading my journal entry. I bet you could come up with another eight in a few seconds. Yet, for all that good stuff, you’re still here. You’re not even burning calories. What possible use could this post have for you?
Why on earth are you still reading?
I’ll tell you why. Because you’re being held at gunpoint, eyes propped open, strapped to a chair, and you’re being forced to read it.
Assuming that’s not the case, I have some other theories.
You don’t really feel like getting up to do those other things. Sure, they’re probably more fun, but they’d require more effort, too. Besides, it’s relatively comfortable in this seat. It could be comfier, sure, but it’s satisfying. It doesn’t take too much work to read this, either. It’s pretty easy to sit here and read, even if you did have to scroll down a minute ago. Lastly, this isn’t a captivating blog post, but it’s entertaining enough that you’re not boring your eyes off. ‘Amusing’ is the word for it. Not too boring, not too exciting. And in any case, you’ve started reading this post. There’s probably not too much left, so you might as well finish it, right?
Oh, please. Don’t give me that. You’ve started lots of things that you haven’t finished. The only reason you’re still here is because you’re being slightly entertained, you’re in a slightly comfortable seat, and it wouldn’t be worth the effort to get up and do something else. As long as I continue to mildly entertain you, you have decided to remain here.
And so here we are. I sit here and write this, and you sit here and read it. We both have better things to do, yet we’re both still here, accepting that ‘mildly amusing’ is enough to keep us from pursuing greatness. We could be changing the world, or just our neighbourhood (heck, we could clean our room), and instead we sit here and settle for less.
Wait a second.
Why the heck am I wasting my time writing this? I have better stuff to do!
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I wrote this in 2012. If you still don't have anything better to do, click here.